So we fix our eyes not on what is seen but on what is unseen since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal. 2 Corinthians 4:18
I thought I had hit rock bottom! I felt that nothing down here could be worse than what I had experienced so far!
However, life has shown me that NO, I could fall even further than I already was. Have you ever felt alone, misunderstood, lost, useless?
Me, again and again, and again! I wonder when it will end? When will I be able to taste the joy, the happiness to say, to feel alive here, on this damn planet where everything we do to get out of it is, in fact, a perpetual rush towards the endless abyss of nullity!
That’s what I thought at the time! Guess what? Life 3 months later showed me that I was about to hit rock bottom.
At that time, I was doing a lot of small jobs without getting that famous permanent job. I was angry at everything and everyone. Nothing was going right in my life.
I wondered what I had done to deserve so many difficulties. I led a life without attractions, without any real goal and genuine desire. Paycheck to paycheck! Damn
At that time, where I lived, a big strike ended; everyone, including myself, was looking for a goal to achieve when the knife fell! It was as if the ground, the world, collapsed under my feet. The pillar of my foundation, which mattered most to me in this world, was no more.
Everything in me was gone, shattered. I was devastated, not knowing what to do. I did what I’ve always done, cope while everything inside me screamed.
How could you leave me like this, alone in this kind of family…
It was horrible for over three years. I wonder how I was able to bear, to face all this. But, looking back now, Lord, I know you gave me the strength to carry on. The power to overcome this pain that wouldn’t go away no matter what I did.
Thank you for saving me from myself. Thank you for loving me and guiding me to my destiny. Thank you, Lord, for protecting me. All that is done in the dark and which now, by your intervention, comes to light.
Thank you, mother, for everything you have given me in life. Thanks for loving me. Rest in peace. Your son who loves you.